Sunday, October 28, 2007

100 Things About Me

1. I was born the 13th of 14 children. I have 10 brothers and three sisters.

2. My parents named me after the lady who owned the liquor store. She was apparently a best friend.

3. I've had red hair until the last few years and it's gotten progressively darker.

4. I now color my hair back to red because I detest people referring to me as a brunette (not that there's anything wrong with it).

5. My Dad got me my first bike at the dump. It had a banana seat and tall handle bars - though one of the handlebars was broken off . There was only a 4 or 5" stump sticking out. I loved that bike.

6. My Dad beat my ass once when my sister's rocking chair arm touched my rocking chair and I called her a booger and he thought I said fucker. I was only five years old. I did not know what the word fucker meant.

7. My family has always said I march to the beat of a different drummer. They're right. My older sister doesn't like me because of it. My younger sister adores me because of it.

8. My Mom made the best homemade biscuits in the world.

9. I knew I liked women when I was on a flight to Texas to see my Grandma and Grandpa. I sat next to a woman who I couldn't take my eyes off of. I was 12.

10. I once saw a picture of a woman in Playboy who looked exactly like her.

11. At 15 I experienced intimacy with a woman for the first time. Actually it was with two different women in the same week. I lied to each and told them they were the first because I didn't want to hurt anyone.

12. My Mom found out about one of the girls and told me if I didn't "fix it" my Dad would find out and make my life miserable so I started being interested in guys to cover my attraction for women.

13. To this day I wonder what my life would be like if I had really been supported when I discovered my sexual orientation.

14. Life sucked when I had to hide so much of myself and grow up believing no one understood me. I never understood why love was conditional.

15. My Dad had a small 20-acre ranch we called the Ponderosa when I grew up. He had 75 head of cattle - each one had a name.

16. My younger sister is who I am the closest too in my whole family.

17. My parents never discussed sex with me growing up.

18. I didn't know anything about masturbation nor did I know that was what I was doing when I was doing it.

19. In 1980, my Dad sold a bull named Wobbles at the livestock auction for the down payment on my first car.

20. I once threw a half-eaten burrito from Taco Bell at my younger sister.

21. I once tried to throw a pass with a bag of Cheetos in a grocery store to my Mom who was in line about to pay for the groceries. It landed on the store manager's bald head!

22. I was beaten as a child and called horrible names by my father who was an alcoholic. It didn't stop until I moved out when I was 17.

23. I was never able to figure out how to forgive him for hurting me nor did I understand why he did it until one day I realized he did the best he could ~ unfortunately his best wasn't good enough. It was at that point I decided to let it go.

24. Those beatings are why I'm so lenient with Auburn Aries.

25. I now know I let the pendulum swing too far the other way with her and I'm trying to create good boundaries. It's never too late.

26. I had a mullet in high school that resembled David Bowie's.

27. I studied dance (modern, ballet, jazz, pointe) for many years.

28. I was supposed to go to Japan and dance professionally but the tour was cancelled on Valentine's day in 1982.

29. I had a gig lined up to be a showgirl at the MGM Grand in Las Vegas but the moron the director of entertainment sent out to see me dance waited until the last possible day to come to the dance studio and I lost the job because I wouldn't have had time to learn the routines by that coming Monday.

30. I had no support from my family in my dancing career either. I was a great dancer.

31. My first concert was The Babies and Alice Cooper. A girl from my dance company made brownies with weed in them for the concert.

32. I hated brownies but ate one to be polite.

33. At the concert I thought I was getting a contact high inside the concert when all of a sudden everyone in our group started laughing at me.

34. I've sailed on a Hobey Cat a loved it.

35. I lived in between the beach and the bay (a minute walk to each) when I lived on my own in San Diego.

36. There really is a flash of green that occurs as the Sun drops behind the horizon.

37. I watched I Love Lucy five times a day growing up.

38. My Dad taught me to shoot when I was 11.

39. I also learned to drive his Massey Ferguson tractor as well as his pickup truck that same year.

40. I never felt like I fit in when I grew up. I had long legs, redhair and a fiery attitude.

41. I didn't start feeling like I fit in until after I left home.

42. Living at the beach gives you a completely different outlook on life.

43. I love being in my forties.

44. I have better friends now than I ever had in my lifetime.

45. I would not turn back the hands of time even if I could.

46. I love that I'm a native San Diegan.

47. I love Mexican food and Patron Margaritas.

48. Some of the best margaritas I've ever had were at Casa de Bandini in Old Town in San Diego.

49. I don't like sweets for breakfast. I prefer breakfast burritos with hot salsa.

50. I don't drink coffee.

51. I prefer Chai or Earl Grey.

52. I love organic, non-fat milk.

53. I am a Pagan. It's the only belief system that's ever fit.

54. I can't put paper in my mouth nor can I see anyone else putting paper in theirs.

55. Wooden toothpicks are out also.

56. We had horses growing up and I fell in love with riding. I never seem to do it anymore.

57. My Mom pushed me toward office skills classes in high school as a backup plan in case dancing didn't pan out. I could take shorthand at 100 wpm.

58. I now work in IT and though I enjoy it, it's not what I meant to do.

59. I have OCD in peculiar ways. For instance, I can't go up the stairs leading the left foot or I have to go back down and start over.

60. My sister, Skinny Girl, has full on OCD with just about everything in her life ~ but in ways that greatly benefit her.

61. I've only traveled internationally to various placed in Mexico.

62. I had a male lover who was an artist who told me I would fit in well in Europe.

63. I say exactly what I think and don't consider that it might freak people out. I doubt I will every change this personality trait.

64. I love Harley Davidson's and if I didn't have a child, would own one of my own. I have to be around for her and don't want to increase the odds of dying because someone didn't see me on a Hog.

65. I never changed schools growing up except for the transition from elementary to middle to high school.

66. Laughter goes a long way with me. Lying to me terminates friendships and relationships.

67. I've been in polyamorous relationships.

68. I paint my toenails even in the winter.

69. An ex-girlfriend had a star named after my Mom after she died. It sounds like a corny thing to do but the framed artwork of the Pisces Constellation hangs in my home office and it makes me feel close to my Mom.

70. An even closer friend made a donation to the Alzheimer's Foundation in my Mom's name. When she gave me the gift I thought it was a joke until I read the entire card. I went from laughter to tears in just seconds.

71. Every year I go to the Oregon coast with my chosen family and I love that we have this tradition.

72. I love watching really great comedians.

73. I always figured if being a professional dancer didn't work out, I'd be a lawyer or a cop. Looking back on those choices I realize those wouldn't have been my life's calling either.

74. I love sex and have never withheld it as punishment for someone else. I would in turn only be punishing myself by not getting it.

75. Everyone in my family has the same high sex drive.

76. Sex truly does get better with age.

77. I have a lot of books I haven't read but will get to them someday. Being a single parent limits the luxury of reading a good book uninterrupted.

78. I never slept well until I bought my Carrington Chase latex bed four years ago. Now I adore sleeping in on the weekends.

79. I spent the first half of my life in relationships. I've spent the last three years single and appreciate more than ever sleeping alone in the middle of the bed.

80. Men from the south with that built in politeness of calling me ma'am, turn me on.

81. Even though I've never been to Montana, it's someplace I think I'd like to retire. Though I don't know if I could be away from the ocean since I've lived near it my entire life.

82. I miss the strength that men bring to my life. I miss feeling safe in a man's arms.

83. I think arrogance is ugly.

84. I hate that I don't have a good set of pliers.

85. I suck at taking care of myself first and it's the first rule you should follow.

86. Sometimes I forget to take my cell phone with me when I leave the house and even though I initially freak out because I left it, I'm always pleased to not hear it ring.

87. I love philosophical conversations but never seem to have enough of them.

88. I fear what it will do to my daughter if I'm taken from this earth too soon.

89. I got married at 19 to a great man but didn't know who I was at that age. I treated him poorly and wish now I had done right by him.

90. We have been dear friends for the last 25 years and I'm grateful we've both grown enough to appreciate each other.

91. I love watching college football and major league baseball. I enjoy watching other sports too, but sometimes not as much.

92. I love the person I've become. What I once perceived as weakness I have come to realize were, in fact, the differences that set me apart from others.

93. I love going to the coast alone and usually go once a quarter but haven't done it much in the last year.

94. I miss it.

95. I love the times I've taken Auburn Aries to the coast with me and we've just chilled out.

96. I snore.

97. I love it when it's windy.

98. I never carry an umbrella and I've never minded getting caught in the rain. It's just hair and I'll eventually dry off.

99. I miss waking up to sunny mornings like when I lived in San Diego. It just starts your day off better when the sun is shining.

100. I think everyone should believe in magic(k).

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