Writing about my funk last week took the power out of it. I felt much better having verbally vomited all of that up via the keyboard. I don't get like that often and I'm grateful for that.
Saturday night I had dinner with The Handsome Prince. I had such a lovely time. It isn't often he and I get time alone to visit. With Toddy and Thor unavailable until later in the evening, it was my opportunity to spend time with someone who can say something besides Thor. Thor.. Thor... Thor.... And I mean that with the utmost love and respect.
You know how it is when you're best friend is in love... It's like those cartoons where the character gets conked on the head and slides to the ground with a halo of little birds tweeting around their brain, except in this case Toddy is still functional but so preoccupied one must remember not to speak of anything important.. It would appear his braincells are Teflon coated with thoughts o' Thor!
I am very happy for both he and Thor. Everything about this relationship seems right. It flows effortlessly and I truly believe these two men were meant to be together. I knew from the minute I met Thor that they were destined to be together and I love the fact that I get to watch it unfold. Probably the most difficult thing was not saying anything about it to either one. If it was fate, it would have to happen on its own. And it did.
I have a twinge of jealousy about their relationship. Not evil jealousy but the good kind. The kind where I hope I will be blessed and find what they have someday. I would love to share my life with someone that I know is my soul mate. My life partner. Someone who loves kids; someone who understands what an Irish temper coupled with red hair means and who can let some of that go without holding it against me; someone who doesn't question my Piscean nature but accepts who I am; someone who appreciates me being a Pagan; someone who thinks the sun rises and sets in my eyes the same way I think that about them; someone with a sex drive as intense as mine and who understands what being a leather woman means.
As you've probably gathered, I ended it with Sexy Girl. Though she has a lot to bring to the table, it wasn't clicking for me. I felt too disconnected from her and decided it was best not to waste each other's time. After seeing Toddy and Thor together, THAT is what love is supposed to be. Anything else and your just settling.
Hot Toddy has found love. I can have it too. Until it gets here, I'm perfectly happy chillin' with Auburn Aries and doing my thing. When the time is right it will all come together. Until then, I won't force fate.
After dinner when Hot Toddy and Thor returned, we visited (wherein I shared way too much information about my past) and then headed out for the evening. We ended up at C.C. Slaughter's. It was there I made the switch from drinking a great Australian red wine over dinner (okay, a whole bottle) to Margaritas. This is bad. Very bad. Don't ever mix alcohol. I was pretty slammed by the end of the evening when we closed the bar.
I ran into some old friends while at C.C.'s and my attention was divided between Toddy and Thor and these other people. One of them (who Thor referred to as "Pretty Boy") and I engaged in quite a bit of conversation and dancing. We hadn't seen each other in months.
You know how last week I was writing about feeling jealous because the other kids get to stay out and play and I don't get to? Part of that jealousy is, at times, due to the fact that their My Boys and sometimes other women just need to step off. It's become a standing joke between Todd and Thor and I.
Well, Saturday night there I was paying attention to other gay men and it happened. Thor leaned across Toddy tapping me on the shoulder and said, "I thought WE were Your Boys... Not those guys. Why are you paying so much attention to them? Now I know how you feel."
It would seem that My Boys care more than I realized and it made my day.
Later on with the evening winding down, Pretty Boy and I were still yammering when I reached up to touch his pecs. Pretty Boy is, by all rights, exactly that. Very, very pretty. Lean body, very built. This wasn't the first time I've touched his chest, but I gotta tell ya, the urge to reach out and touch him overtook me until I had my entire hand cupping one of Pretty Boy's pecs. It was extremely firm, well shaped and impressive.
Then I heard it. "Oh, THAT'S IT! From now on I'm working out every day until my chest is huge and when we go out you won't want to touch Pretty Boy's chest anymore, you'll only want to touch mine and feel how big it is."
Now, just as a matter of record, Thor is no slouch in the "being built" department. I see him running around the house in a pair of shorts and no shirt and even *I* have to take a double take. He's yummy stuff, that man.
And work out, he did. While I recovered Sunday from an evil hangover, Thor did, indeed, start pumping iron.
Poor Toddy, I hope he doesn't explode from having Thor for a boyfriend and being THAT built... From what I understand, he's close to exploding already!