He loaded the last of his belongs into the truck. We had shared our last cigarette, our last drink, our last laugh, and the last of our tears. For now anyway.
We shared one last good-bye hug both thinking about the impact the other has had on our lives. He thanked me for not only accepting him just as he is and not only for accepting him into my home, but for welcoming him into and making him a part of my family. My family is so important to me. I doubt he realizes how deeply those words touched my heart.
He said good-bye from the entry with that deep, sexy voice. I heard his voice crack as he tried to be strong. I could feel his heart melt onto the floor knowing what he had to leave behind – his home, his new family in me and Aries, and the new found love for Hot Toast. I didn’t want to see the look in his eyes as he walked out the door and as such never walked toward the front door.
I simply told him good-bye and that I loved him.
I watched from the front window as the truck pulled away. I felt the tears well up. Though I’ve known for a while Thor was leaving, I hadn’t actually allowed myself to future trip on how empty my house would be. That moment was now upon me.
I walked downstairs and looked at the emptiness.
There was silence. The deafening sound was almost painful. The chatter and constant sensory feed faded like the afternoon sun disappears into the night.
I stood there for a while and let the noise find the exit. It grew more distant as I walked upstairs.
I allowed myself an hour to sit upon my pity pot. To unnecessarily evaluate why such a great housemate crossed my path only to make an exit almost five months later. And when that time was completed, I was done.
You can’t be in two places at once and I can’t move forward if I linger in the past.
A sense of calm came over me. Now I feel ready to prepare the house for sale. I am excited about moving on. I don’t know when or where that will be but I know everything will be fine.
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