Thursday, February 10, 2005

Kickin' the Clutter

There's too much information buzzing around in my head. I don't mean just today. I mean in general -- my mind has turned into a landslide of information, contemplation, trepidation, emotion, and decisions.

It doesn't seem that long ago that cruising through my day and being a Mom was it. Now there's all this mental clutter that I have to kick around just to have a simple thought. Everything has a dependency. Life has become one big "if-then" statement.

I want my simple, easy-going life back.

I want the things in life that are just supposed to "be" to stop changing.

There was a day when I would check the mileage on my car and actually know ahead of time the need for an oil change was approaching. Now everytime I check the freakin' thing, I'm over by a thousand miles.

I want to have the ability to go downstairs to the cafe in our building and get my breakfast and/or lunch and know I'm getting what I ordered. It's not a difficult request. Ever since the new owners took over, nothing is the same. I don't want them to ask about my life or where my "friend" is (if Toddy isn't with me, they freak out). I just want my food.

I just ordered tuna on a french roll. The tuna was grainy (what little there was), the roll was some dried out funky type of bread and not the usual San Francisco brand french bread. They no longer put pickles on tuna sandwiches. I mean, what is that all about? Everybody puts pickles on tuna, ya dumb bastards.

Oh, and I guess that just for today "no tomato" means load-the-bitch-up-with-tomatoes,-I-can't-get-enough-of-the-soggy-fuckers. Sheesh! It's not a lot to ask, people.

When I call the bottled water company and tell them to skip my next delivery, that doesn't mean leave me two more bottles.

When I make a deposit into the bank, it would be nice to know that the funds will actually be available just like every other time I've made a deposit.

When I go to C.C. Slaughter's to see Tim the Hot Toddtender, it would be nice to be able to actually see him and get my margaritas made the way I like them -- the way only he can.

It's always something. Busy here, complicated there. The entire universe just needs to take a breath and get back to what's real.

Until then, I will just maneuver away from reality into blogsphere and get my laughs where I can.

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