Tuesday, March 13, 2007

"It beats catchin' herpes from a drag queen..."

Once upon a time a High Priestess came to visit a family of Auburn-haired girls who lived in the Northwest. The elder Auburn was turning 44 and had planned on spending a weekend at the Coast with her family, so the High Priestess brought her guava jelly and coconut syrup Warm Cookies with a Whiskey Chaser mental notebook and joined in on the fun.

The smaller Auburn was so excited to see her "Aunt" that she could hardly contain herself. The days and nights were filled with laughter and love and talks and great dinners. The High Priestess hadn't had a cocktail in many weeks so when Auburn Pisces twisted 'em up, the High Priestess grew increasingly happy as the evenings wore on.

At a Mexican restaurant the Auburn's refer to as "The Uzsh" (short for Usual), the High Priestess became quick friends with the server who decided to name a dish after her. He said he would call it "The Pula." Apparently there was something lost in the Hawaiian to Mexican translation.

The next day Auburn's and the Priestess decided they were all going to get pierced together, sisters in pain and extra holes. First there was the time spent in Claire's for Auburn Aries' double earlobe piercings. This portion of the adventure took a long, long time. Auburn Aries was very brave and Auburn Pisces was very proud of her.

Next the three friends were off to a piercer so Auburn Pisces could get her ear cartilage pierced and the High Priestess could get fourth (and fifth) holes since three on one side and four on the other were not nearly enough! All went well though the piercer was very chatty.

It was after the two elder's piercings that little Auburn Aries realized she still had not spent her gift card at Claire's so we went back there again. It was at this juncture Auburn Pisces decided she could not frequent another Claire's for a long, long time.

The grown up weekend at the coast proved to be a fantastic weekend. Auburn Pisces got there first and was able to wash away the stresses of life in total solitude just her and the ocean. Sometimes there's nothing better.

The High Priestess went from being surrounded by the beauty of the Butte a stone's throw from Auburn Pisces' deck (only if you have a really strong arm and are a good thrower), to the uncrowded, peaceful Oregon Coast. Auburn Pisces watched the High Priestess face the Powers of the West as she called upon and received all that she needed. Auburn Pisces could hear the High Priestesses thoughts as she took everything in. It was a memory Auburn Pisces will never forget.

Golden Boy had a tough time keeping the muddler away from the High Priestess. It didn't seem to matter how many times the High Priestess was told a muddler is not a sex toy, she was always caught sneaking to the bar (a.k.a. kitchen counter) and trying to make off with the muddler. This made Auburn Pisces very sad because the muddler, which was a gift from Golden Boy, was critical in the way Golden Boy and JR would masterfully create her margaritas.

Everyone at the beach run shared many laughs over the weekend. One of which was the story of the High Priestess trying to be hoisted into Pony's huge-ass, 4x4, lifted, 35" tire, big mo fo truck after drinking even Auburn Pisces' margaritas at CC's. Hot Toddy went to great lengths to help his friend with the little legs try to get into a truck that was half a foot taller than her. Auburn Pisces almost missed the visuals of such an effort because she was soberly taking in the people and atmosphere - she could have driven if she needed to - just sayin'.

On Saturday morning the family was sitting around the breakfast table when the subject of lost and found at CC's came up. It was then that Auburn Pisces told Golden Boy any time one of her lost MAC lipsticks turned up in lost and found she wanted them back. Golden Boy tried to explain to Auburn Pisces that you really don't want lipstick back that's been in the lost and found.

Auburn Pisces tried to argue back by pointing out that no one wears her light shade of lipstick and no one would want it.

Golden Boy appeared surprised Auburn Pisces didn't get his point. "You don't want it back" he snapped, "it's better than getting herpes from a drag queen!!!" Auburn Pisces knew that Golden Boy was right and decided no lost lipstick was worth it.

There was also the afternoon run to the casino in which Auburn Pisces wanted no part. She really just wanted to hang back and get some ocean time but Vidal and JR were insistent. The High Priestess and Golden Boy wouldn't let up either. Reluctantly Auburn Pisces conceded and headed into Lincoln City with the gang.

Little did Auburn know that while she was gone Hot Toddy baked her a birthday cake and then sauteed onions to cover the cake smell. The gang surprised Auburn Pisces and sang Happy Birthday to her and gave her a card filled with thoughts of love that made Auburn Pisces cry...really hard. Never before had Auburn been so touched by her family.

All in all it was another great weekend at the coast for the everyone. Whether someone was throwing up in their handbag or throwing lighters at a sliding glass door because the music had stopped or whether it was because a big surprise or two was shared - or whether or not you talked to the stars on a ride home or ended up covered by a blanket and pillow on the bathroom floor because that's as far as one could go - or even if you got really hot and cooled off with the ocean breeze against your naked breasts in front two of your Boys, it was a week that will not ever be forgotten.

Auburn Pisces is blessed by those she has chosen to surround her.

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