Thursday, November 17, 2005

Go eight steps down the hall

Aries Dialogue

AA: Mommy, I want to do gymnastics and learn how to play the guitar.

AP: If You want to take guitar lessons, I’ll buy you a guitar and you can try it out. I think you’d probably like being able to play an instrument.

AA: It’s cheaper than a piano.

AP: It is – but if you want to play piano I’ll need a little more time to plan THAT purchase.

AA: What about gymnastics?

AP: Honey, if you want to take gymnastics to be more flexible or to get better balance or to just learn some fun stuff, I’m all for you taking gymnastics. I just don’t want you to go into it thinking you could compete.

AA: Why couldn’t I compete?

AP: Girls who compete in gymnastics are always stick people and you and I aren’t built like stick people. We never will be.

AA: [long pause] Thaaaaat’s not very encouraging. It’s true…but it’s not an encouraging thing to say. It isn’t about winning, Mom.

AP: [ouch – on both counts, i.e., her point and for dialing my ass in like that without even realizing she’s done it]

Aries Dialogue, Part Two

In the front windshield of my car, positioned on the glass behind my rearview mirror was a static sticker of a rainbow peace sign. It’s been in that same place on my last two cars. At one point this last summer, I took it down. Since I already have both a rainbow sticker and Leather Pride colors in my back window I figured there was no need to be gay all day at both ends of my car. Well, that and another reason which I won’t share.

Anyhoo, Auburn Aries was in the front seat of my car and chose to ask me about it

AA: What was right there [pointing the outline where the sticker was located]

AP: That peace sign rainbow sticker.

AA: Why did you take it off?

AP: It was slightly crooked.

AA: You could have just straightened it. You know, you “slightly” have OCD.

AP: How do you know what OCD is?

AA: Because you’re just like Elektra. Don’t you remember when she put that stuff on the kitchen counter and how she counted how many steps it took to get places in her house? You’re exactly like that. You can totally get through our whole house in the blackest dark. See, you ARE, you’re just like Elektra.

How in the hell did she get all of that out of my taking down a sticker??? Okay, maybe I'm a little OCD about certain things but just like Elektra? Hmm....I wish.


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Anonymous said...

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